The fact that I’m so inconsistent with writing pieces still bothers me but yet I don’t want to force anything. I don’t want writing to become another one of the things that I feel obligated to do as I’m not really writing for anyone else but myself. But even with that I still keep on putting more weight into my shoulders. A lot of things bother me and will continue to bother me but at the same time I’ve been a bit numb lately. I definitely won’t settle for this but I don’t know how to fix it at all. I want to have a big voice one day, I don’t want to be small anymore.